Last night the kids and I had a very interesting conversation. I tell them every week or every other week that if there is anything they need to talk to me about, I am here for them and will listen. Whether they are struggling at school, having a fight with a friend or whatever else is on their mind, I will hear them out. EVEN if they think it is something I do not want to hear, I want them to know they can always come to me!
So, I sat them down again last night and said all of this again. Lil C automatically thought I was going to give them some bad news. I assured them this was not the case. So in the course of our conversation it turns out that, drum roll please, the kids DO NOT like that their father is dating and only tell him it is ok because they want HIM to be happy. How do you respond to that? I told them that if their father asks them a question they should respond truthfully as their feelings are just as important.
Doodle was visibly upset and I assured her it was ok. I told them I loved them and was always here for them. They said a lot of things I found interesting but I was not judgemental about any of it. I am not sure what else I can do. We moved on to a better subject and I went off to fix dinner. The most interesting thing of the night was right before I set dinner on the table I saw that Doodle had her clipboard out. She left it on the table and there was a list there and it went like this:
1. Turn off tv and sit down
2. Talk to dad about her.
3. Have long talk with dad.
4. Meeting adjourned.
Wow! We had to rush off to girl scouts right after dinner so I can only hope that if there was time for this particular conversation last night that it went well for them. Maybe hearing it from his children will make him think more about the situation and what it is doing to our children. One can only hope.