May 5, 2011

Compliments

Confession?

I have a hard time with these. I have no idea why. Seriously.

When I receive one? So hard.

I am not gracious about it, and I often wonder if that makes the other person regret giving it.

Perfect example? At work, my boss will say something stellar about me, either to a customer or a fellow employee. I turn it right around to how wonderful I think she is.

Classic deflection. Yes, I am aware. I get all flustered, with this overwhelming rush of embarrassment and can actually feel my face turning bright red. Now I don't embarrass easily, but in this category? Winning!

I mostly feel that the compliment is something that I didn't need to be recognized for. It's just me doing my job, that I get PAID to do. SO what if I am good at it? Isn't that why I was hired in the first place?

Or when PB compliments the way I look, or that he likes my hair/eyes/smile. Well, my physical features are what I was born with. I don't wear a lot of makeup, or spend hours in the bathroom every day primping and priming. 

I did some thinking about how I compliment others, and how often I do that. Shocking revelation! 

I don't compliment other people very often. There are a few here and there, oh I like your shirt, that's a great necklace, your shoes are cute, and that variety. 

But I don't really extend too many to my friends, my children, or my man.  

Do they all think I don't appreciate them, don't love them or don't care because I don't say anything? And why is that barrier in place anyway? Its not like the actual words would be hard to say. How hard is it to tell your children they did something well, or that I am proud of them just for who they are? It's not difficult to tell my man I appreciate what he does for me, or to express to my friends how much their support means to me. Not hard, you say? I know........... so why do I struggle so much?

Here's the other thing: I often wonder if people who are overly complimentary are just fishing for compliments about themselves. So, if I am that way, will people think they have to compliment me back? Cause that is not what I want the end result to be.

So, any tips, suggestions or overall help you can offer on how to be more gracious I would gladly take. Somethings gotta give.

1 comment:

salmoneggrolls said...

I've been meaning to tell you how great your blog is! :)