Titles, Labels, Generalizations

And, here we go.

 

We are all guilty of it. Don't even pretend you aren't because I am calling bullshit.

 

We ALL use labels or titles in reference to other people.

 

Short guy driving a monster truck? Small penis and he is compensating.

 

Woman walking by with too much makeup on, falling out of her clothes that are skin tight? Hooker.

 

I am SO guilty of this. I LOVE to people watch! SeaTown has some great places to sit and watch the masses walk by.

 

Most of the time, I know NOTHING about the people walking by, but based on their hair color, clothes, makeup, tats or piercings, I can weave the best stories out of thin air about their lives. AND I don't feel guilty for doing it. Or sharing it with others.

 

However, EVERY woman I know has that ONE word, ONE title, ONE label that gets the hair on the back of her neck to stand up if someone calls her by it.

 

Of course you want to know what MY one word/title/label is right?

 

SOCCER MOM.

 

Oi.

 

To me, a SOCCER MOM is:

 

A yuppie. Living the Minivan dream. Or the Suburban dream. Take your pick. Stay at home mom. Sits at Starbucks sipping her latte (that takes her 5 minutes to order because she MUST have this or that added), with her yuppie friends, in the latest of clothes that EVERY other SOCCER MOM is wearing, talking about the most useless of topics, like what color their nail polish is, or the newest thing on sale at Banana Republic.

 

Ugh. I think I just vomited in my mouth.

 

These are the women that cant go camping because they can't get DIRTY. Their idea of "Roughing it" is a hotel. They are more concerned with what goes on their body than the nastiness they spew out of their mouths as they talk about us REGULAR moms. They take longer to get ready to go to the grocery store than I take getting ready for work every day. These women have HIGH MAINTENANCE written all over them.

 

You know us REGULAR mom's when you see us. The ones that show up in a dirty car. That don't have their hair and makeup done like they just came from the salon to go to a SOCCER game. That don't spend the whole game talking about EVERYONE ELSE. We are the back of the bus crowd, laughing and having a good time in each others company, no matter WHAT you are wearing. We actually WATCH the game.

 

Now don't get me wrong...... I have NO problem with these women. I am just NOT one of them. And I don't want to be LABELED as one.

 

Yes, Doodle plays soccer. Yes, I go to her sporting events and Yes, I drive an SUV. This does NOT make me a SOCCER MOM.

 

I am an individual and should be LABELED as such. Nobody puts Baby in a corner!

 

So spill it readers, whats your WORD/TITLE/LABEL that gets your claws to come out?